rest in peace

rest in peace milly. You were a great dog. I remember seeing you when you first came to my house. You were so shy and nervous. You even had a pink collar. After a couple weeks, you became a brat. Always hanging next to my mom, or looking for my brother. They were your favorites. I loved it when you came crying to go to the bathroom. You're the only dog that I know who does that. You would never go pee or poo in the house ever. That's a small reason why mom loved you so much. I knew that you went through a lot of hate and abuse with your previous owner, but when you came into our house, I knew you were going to forget about all that. My mom loved you like you were her own son. You would always try and get her attention. I miss you. I miss how you would always come to me only if I had food, or you wanted to go to the bathroom. You would always cry and beg for me to pick you up and put you on my bed at 4am. I miss you so much right now. When I got home and found you on the floor, I knew something was wrong. You would be able to get back up and usually walk around, but when I saw that you had no strength for anything, I didn't know what to do. I'm sorry you were in so much pain, and I'm sorry I treated you wrong at times. You already know how much the family loved you, but I wish you knew how much I really cared about you. I know that I shouldn't be so attached to a pet, but you were really like a little brother to me. I always had to take care of you and watch out for you,but those were the best times I've had. After I lost grandma, I would've always been home alone and sad. I'm thankful for having you be a part of my life for the past three years.

rip milly. 8/6/05 - 12/19/08

No title.

New Life youth went to a retreat to Yosemite Prayer Mountain. To be honest with you, I wasn't expecting much. The week before retreat was just horrible, and I was starting to lose trust in God. Shocker huh? Life seems to get harder when you try to get closer to God. at least that's how it is for me. As we got to the retreat place, we unloaded and had worship. During that worship, we had a time of just meditation for some, crying out to God for others, or just to worship. I wasn't yelling at the top of my lungs, screaming out to God, and asking why he was making my life so hard. I was just listening to others pray. I was hearing the prayers of true believers. They weren't praying for themselves, they were praying, with a fire, for their fellow brothers and sisters in christ. They were asking God to comfort, lift up, and just guide whoever it was they were praying for. I wasn't sad or gloomy about the whole dog situation. I was just looking for escape from all of this. From the drama, friends, family, personal problems. I was at the retreat to really experience isolation from the world, and to experience God. My goal was to just listen for God. It was to just hear what God wanted to tell me. One verse that stuck out to me was Psalm 46:10
Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth.

This verse is so beautiful. Especially in the morning when it's just time between you and God. Be STILL and KNOW that I AM GOD. usually in the morning, that's when my thinking switch is turned off, but when I read that verse, I really just meditated on it. God showed me that prayer and QT is very essential to your faith.

As for being back home, I feel like I'm being bombed with thousands of problems and conflicts. Our leader Mike said that it would happen. He said that the Devil is out there to bring us down and drive us away from God. It's not going to happen. I'm ready take on whatever the Devil has in store, because I have God on my side. As corny as that sounds, I'm not backing down.

winter break

It's not supposed to be 30 degrees fahrenheit in fremont during the winter.My dog isn't supposed to be this sick. I'm not supposed to be under so much stress. There are a lot of things that aren't supposed to happen, but it happens anyways. I should be like Job. No matter what happened in his life, He stuck by God and trusted in him. I need that mindset. No matter what is thrown in front of me, I need to trust and believe in my God. Now you can read about my personal problems and just say "Oh wow this guy's life sucks...or wow... He's pretty religious." I have no reason to tell you about my life. I only write on this to remind myself of the struggles that I've gone through in the past, to overcome and establish a new mark. I write on here to remind myself that I change. I write on here to remind myself that I'm never perfect. I tend to forget a lot about the struggles that I go through, and I'm too selfish to help out others when I see the same problems. There are always ups and downs, but I still come out with my head held up high.

















:|

This past week

This past week has been terrible. worst week before winter break I've had by far. Lost to irvington, and when I got home, I found my dog lying on the floor, vomit everywhere, and he couldn't get up. He's been in the hospital since Wednesday night, and from what I know, He's not going to be coming back home. He has a virus and I just want him to be as comfortable as possible. I pray that he'll come out okay, but it's likely that he isn't going to.

LIK O M G

good to get this thing off my chest. Now I'm just waiting for an answer.

Dreams I like this song?

I got second at novice. This just drives me to work harder to get first. Empty Me - Chris Sligh is a good song. Even if he was on american idol and looks like Jack Black/Jack Osbourne :]

HEY YOU

For the most part, today went pretty well. First match, I got a bye :]. Second match, I won with points. Third match, I lost against some guy from Pittsburg, and got 2nd place. I'm just happy I went to the tournament and went with my team. my teeth hurt right now.

Groups, cliches, and acquantinces.

Today I walked around American at lunch. By myself. I was listening to music, and I was thinking to myself, Why do people act so differently around friends? What makes it so attractive to be accepted into a group, that is so judgemental? I don't know, that's just me talking. I've been through a lot. Groups that judge by sight and actions. I know I don't fit in. I know that I'm not accepted, at least fully by everyone. God accepts me with open arms. While I was walking around school, I just focused on those people that sat alone. That ate alone. That walked alone. I don't know why I focused on them so much. I even imagined Jesus, being alone. No one talking to him, no one saying hi, no one even acknowledging him. When Jesus was put on the cross, no one wanted to have anything to do with him. Peter even denied him three times. We do this every single day. No matter how we look at it, I personally think, that we can't fully trust in God enough to pull through for everything we want from him, because we ALWAYS forget that God is here. God is infinite. God is really indescribable. He's so many things, and He's perfect. God can open up your eyes and reveal to you, anything and everything you've asked to see and probably more. God can rejuvenate you, and give you the burning passion that you've been searching for. Lately, I've been thinking about what Jesus said when He returns.

(Mat 25:41 NIV) "Then he will say to those on his left, 'Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels.

(Mat 25:42 NIV) For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink,

(Mat 25:43 NIV) I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.'

(Mat 25:44 NIV) "They also will answer, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?'

(Mat 25:45 NIV) "He will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.

I don't want to say, that I never invited Jesus in, or that I gave him nothing to eat and drink, or I never clothed him, or looked after him in prison. I hear stories of people seeing Jesus' face on those in need. I hear of people who really just give up everything just so they can store up their treasures in heaven. We hear that phrase almost every weekend. Store your treasures in Heaven. I don't think enough people take that saying seriously, including myself. I think it's time to start living as Jesus would want me to live. PS. I read Crazy Love. It was a pretty good book. If you want to read a book to challenge yourself to your christian walk, or even just get a jumpstart to get back with God, read that book. God works in very mysterious ways. :D

Me Vs. Maradona Vs. Elvis

So this week was thanksgiving. I had a very relaxing break. There were some problems here and there, but overall it was pretty good. Had practice from mon-wed, and didn't do much except call up Kev and chill at union landing. Thanksgiving was pretty fun. Didn't have the whole family there, missing couple people, but it was pretty cool. Had brother's friends come over from berkeley. fun fun. Friday I went biking over to Kev's. It was FREEZING. hahaha tip for anyone who goes exercising in the morning. Wear gloves, sweats, and a scarf. I had a sweatshirt, ipod, bike, and bball shorts. Bad choice. We biked over to Johnny's. Gave him a surprise room raiders visit. hahaha. Then Kevin and I went to shop at Valley Fair, but went to go visit his relative first. We drove around.........for at least an hour and half. His sister got lost, and we found a secret house like in Harry Potter. hahaha just kidding. It was the wrong number address. After that pleasant experience, we went to Vally Fair. I was walking around with Kev, and we went to random stores. Saw Olivia. Wasn't really the most comfortable situation. I know that she saw the message. If she won't answer, then I don't really care. After I saw her, we went to newpark for a little bit. I bought airmaxes from vf. When we got to newpark, some punks pushed their friend into me on purpose. From the earlier experience with Olivia, I was already mad. I just mugged them and let my anger loose on Kevin. just kidding. It was a pretty bad day and I was in rage mode. We got home, and biked around UC for a bit. It helped me get my mind off things. It was pretty relaxing. Went to church, and went ice skating with the kids. Pretty fun day. Came home. I was supposed to wake up at 7:20 and bike over to Kevins. I did wake up on time, but I looked outside and saw that it was hella foggy, so I changed my mind. hahaha. Then he called me around 9 ish and I was in zombie mode. Went to church, and had a pretty stressful day today. Things really weren't going how they were supposed to, but I got things done. Stayed at church for the entire day, played ball. Got home and ate food. Here I am. I'm thinking of going inside my garage and pumping my bike tires. Maybe go biking outside, but it'll probably be freezing. hahaha well I won't be updating for a while, since I'm gonna be busy with school and all, but I hope that all is well for you. Things will get better for me.

The mind

I think I'm going insane in the membrane.

PostSecret Project @ AHS

Go at lunch to SAC and look at them. Maybe it'll motivate you to make one, or reach out and get to know someone new. I know it did for me.

Life

Life is a weird word. Things are going very well for me right now. I'm truly thankful for everything in my life. Sure...there are times when I just want to take a break. I want to relax, and forget about school, friends, church, and family....but I don't have to. Ever since I went to six flags, everything's been sort of falling into place for me. Things are really looking up. Even when I get stressed out, it isn't as bad as before. Couple months ago, I'd be going crazy and like yelling 24/7. Right now, I just relax and think things through. I get my stuff done. I don't really complain anymore. I'm really hoping that my attitude will remain the same all throughout the school year. Junior year is tough, but I'm hoping to get through it with no problems. As for friends....I can honestly say that I trust no one. Within the school circle, maybe two or three have my complete trust, but that's it. I'm tired of all the fake attitudes and friendships. Who cares what people think? When they talk behind your back, are they really worth trying to stay friends with? In the long run, NONE of them are going to try and maintain the friendship. Maybe 1 out of 100 will, but that's it. Find people who care about you and who accept you as you are. It might sound hella cliche, but it's true. You can ignore my ranting about friends, since I have a very personal experience from it. God provides. that's all I'm going to say.

...............

No comment.

Update.

So grades are looking really good for first quarter! Trying to keep it up throughout the school year. Wrestling starts monday. 3 more days. WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! Things are really chill right now. Hoping to keep it that way for a while. No worries, No struggles. Yeah I still fall and stumble, but who doesn't? That doesn't mean that I should keep on repeating the same mistakes. Things come and go, but if I don't take advantage of it, then I'll never know. Keep your head up kid.

Bleeding Loveeeeeeeeeeeeee

that's the best song ever. The only thing that keeps ME going is seeing others who can't. It motivates me to do even more and to push myself because I know that I don't want to be the one who says "I can't." 11 MORE DAYS

Hello Hello

So things are going very well at the moment. Ranked 21 in physics out of like 33,34. Got my grade up a lot. Almost at a B. I've been reading a lot of books lately, but I don't know. Reading for fun is always more enjoyable/rewarding than reading for school. Only sometimes....is it okay to read for school. I love reading! I need a new bible. REMINDER TO SELF! buy it from amazon ftw. lol. I wanna learn more korean. SCHOOL IS DEEEEE BAEST! Halloween this year is GOING TO BE OH SO FUN! WILL POST UP PICTURES OF COSTUME FROM SCHOOL ON FRIDAY. prepare for glory. :D

OMG LOL

hahahahahahah too funny

my history teacher.

My history teacher is 5ft and 11 3/4 inches. My best friend thinks I have a teacher crush on her. I don't. She's too tall for me :[

phunnie post!

These pictures make me lol. It helps cheer me up :D

OH YEAH and I want these. Anyone wanna buy them for me?
http://extremesfx.com/p-56-zombie.aspx



















But more on a serious note...
Today I saw Olivia...and was expecting a little more out of the conversation than "pretty beastlike." I saw her, asked her how she was, and how water polo was, and then she answered and left. Guess there isn't much to talk about anymore. Is that my fault? Probably. Do I wish that we still talked? Probably. Do I regret it? Probably.

Things in the past...should be in the past. Why bother bringing anything back up? Bury your hatchet.

So today in history class

It was a priceless moment. My best friend and I were talking about digimon, and how they were so cool. She said that they were hella stupid and unreal. I argued that the whole point was to make little children believe that they were real, so they could use their imaginations and then SHE SPIT/DROOLED AND LAUGHED LIKE THE DRAGON THING FROM JURASSIC PARK. You know....that monster thing that spans it's headwings and spits acid on you? lol yeah it was hella funny :]

I'm good to go

Today was the 3 on 3 basketball tournament at New Life. It could've gone so much better, but due to certain circumstances, we lost all four games, and were the first team to get kicked out of the whole tournament. If I wanted to lose all four games, I'd rather go play for free than pay $60. Next time, I'm not sticking to the same team.

woot spring break!

so today, youth group council and praise team went to Six Flags. It was a very very very fun and relaxing day. Yeah things have been really stressful and and hectic the past week or two, but I don't know. today I just forgot about everything and had fun. I didn't think once about praise team, church, school, friends, or anything until after we got out of the park. I think everyone needs a day off once in a while just to enjoy themselves. It helped me out a lot. I just have to think back on this every time things seem to get a little out of control, and just rely and trust in God that he'll provide a way.

She paints me blue.

So ever get the feeling that you're way too nice? that you're taken advantage of all the time for being so nice? maybe it's just me, but I don't know. I really think I'm too nice for my own good. What do I get out of it? Who actually cares that I care? I'm just going to stop complaining, cause it's not going to solve anything or get me anywhere. hope everyone is having a good week.

woot

trance all day everyday.

hellllloooooooooooooooo

So many things cluttered and held in
wanting to be released all from a simple whim.
seeing from your perspective and knowing well
that things will change, waiting to tell
when the moment is right and everything is fine
face it. it won't be, so don't waste anymore time.
get all that you need in order and on the dot.
hurry and rush before it's all gone.

October 1st, 2008

It's only a month into school. If I really plan to manage school, church, and wrestling, then I need to get my act together. Stay focused,work for what you earn, and just keep the goal in sight.

attack of stress from outer space!

Sometimes, I get overwhelmed by school work, social life, and other things that tie in, but somehow I manage to get through it alright. I might not turn to God for help sometimes, but He still turns me around in some way and gives me a chance to really just reflect. It's like when you fall so far away and when you think you've reached rock bottom, God steps in and everything in your life just seems to turn around.



When I used to get REALLY sick, to the point of delirium, it was really bad. I'd have a high fever, sleep most of the day, and what got really scary was that when I was sick, I'd see and hear things in really fast motion. like people would be blurs and words would be jumbled. That's kinda how life feels right now. It's gonna clear up and get better just like it does when I'm sick, so just gotta deal with it for now right? Stay focused and work for what you earn.

URGENT NEWS

EVERYONE I HAVE URGENT NEWS!!!!!!



























































CANON BALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!

Reflection

Looking into the shaded reflection of one's hands
seeing the marks left and calluses formed over by time
feeling reality slip while your sanity still stands.
Staring into eyes that seem to drop rather than climb

HEY

:( I gotta keep going back to Edwards.

Woot

Got my wrestling shoes, but I wish i got red or blue instead of black :[, and I got $277. just gotta serve my appointment for edwards tomorrow and i'm good for the week.

Today just wasn't my day.

I hate it when someone thinks that they're better than you or when they think that they can assume things that aren't even true. Some people can't even take a hint, when you're telling them that you don't want to talk to them. forget it. I'm too tired to even start.

Only you and me

Guilt trips.










When you get scolded or lectured, doesn't it seem like you've heard it a million times? I don't know, but sometimes for me at least, I feel that if it's so easy to fall and slip, why are we forgiven and allowed to keep on living like we do? Part of me wants to blame the Devil, and part of me wants to blame myself for being so weak and close-minded. It's true for me to say that both of those things hinder me from being used by God to do his will. The amazing thing is, even when things seem to be at it's worst, God steps in and leads me home.

I AM AMERICA AND SO CAN YOU!

Stephen Colbert is a genius. So I haven't had a computer for the past two days. It broke on tuesday cause I tried to connect a scanner, and didn't install the program.....so I got the blue screen of death. A very sad day indeed. After my crying and mourning, I turned it into the hands of Joylap. then I went to practice bball. I met some interesting people. I scored the game winning shot with a 3 pointer :] by luck -_- but whatever. then played bball again the next day. Today I went, and today was not my day. I missed a lot. I got into photo! so happy. I left my starcraft cd in my old dell which is currently at Joylap -_-. I hope I can get it tomorrow. So basically what ended up happening was that my old dell was pretty much bleh, but I was able to transfer all the important word documents, pictures, and music that I needed into this new computer. Only down side is that the fan sucks. maybe needs a graphics card. So when I got the computer today, it didn't work cause one wire wasn't connected. I was furious. anyways whatever. I forgot what I was going to add....oh my classes are pretty cool. My ID card is pretty bleh. lol :D I just realized how big the tower is for my desktop. I feel productive.

Oh Happy Day

School is fun! hahaha it's been pretty good for the past three days. hopefully it'll be the same for the whole school year. Praise bands getting better. My spiritual walk is too. I can't wait till winter retreat. I reallllllly wanna start photography. need to switch out of spanish 3 asap. i feel bad :[. this week is gonna be good.

grrr

I just found out the guy that sold me the pedal at guitarcenter wrote the wrong address. STUPID! hahahaha My address is supposed to be riverbend, but he put riverbent -_-. hopefully they didn't ship it out yet. -_-

Guitar

I went to the labor day sale on monday at guitar center and did some thinking. I know that I want a les paul, but what's the point? sure it's a new guitar, better pickups, great looks, and a superb tone...but it's just a guitar you know? I have 3 guitars. 2 electric, and one acoustic/electric. I bought $60 worth of strings and a guitar pedal. it still hasn't come yet.

Society

Society is so stupid. So many people fall into the fad of fashion, money, and almost everything that has to do with what's "in". Now that I look back to everything I've sold, whether it's shoes, clothes, or miscellaneous items, what was the point? Yeah I get money, but I never remember what I spend it on. I either spend it on something, or just save it. money is useless. fashion is useless. Just keep what you have and don't sell anything except maybe something too small for you. Something you won't regret selling.

Imperfection.

No one is perfect. Of course no one is to blame, and we shouldn't be judging anyone, but it's human nature. It's human nature that I feel a certain dislike of people who try to act perfect but still act like they're no different from someone next to them. Let me explain this a little more. Of course a christian is one who acts like Christ. I know that I have my faults. I know that I mess up. I know that my actions reflect my character. What's amazing is that...we as human beings...condemn each other for our wrongs. If I make one small mistake, someone will immediately point that out and put me on the spot. Is it wrong to be so judgmental? I don't think so. The way I see it.... is that....if we as christians fall and stumble, we're put on the spot because we're supposed to be like "Christ". That's in a literal term. Because Jesus died on the cross for us, shouldn't we be saved and happy? No. We should strive to be like Christ in every way we can. Of course it's hard, and it's almost impossible for most people, but what keeps us from trying to be like Him? Is it the fear of being caught up for your mistakes? Is it the fear of being judged by everyone around you? Maybe it's the fear of not being accepted. It could be the fear of the sacrifices you have to make in order to follow Christ. Honestly, I have all of those fears. It's only human that you feel that way. If you don't have any of those fears...then kudos to you. Some people out there are always looking for faults that christians have. What can you do about it? sure you can read your bible and pray...but really...what does that do if your faith in God isn't solid? Personally....I can say that my faith and belief in God is as solid as a rock. I'm judged almost everyday. by christians and nonchristians alike. So what keeps me up and believing in what I believe in? My personal relationship with God. Theres no way to describe it. It's a personal relationship. Yeah I'm not perfect. I sin. I do things I'm not supposed to do....but what gives you the right to judge me? What gives you the right as a human being to say what's right and wrong? The way I see it...this world is controlled by the Devil. he finds ways to make you fall and to drive you away from God in any way possible. He can turn everyone away from you. He can make your life take crazy turns and put you in situations that you think you can't handle. I know that I've gone through it, and I'm far from escaping it, but God will either make me go through it, to come back up stronger, or allow me to go through it because of my stupidity and shortsightedness. God can guide you and help you through any block the devils put in front of you. Everyone has their shortcomings, but thanks to God, we're given the chance to live our lives with God guiding us in anything and everything if we just accept that no one is perfect, that we're sinners, and if we believe that God sent his one and only pure, perfect, blameless, and righteous son Jesus to die for our sins to allow us to have a personal relationship with God and if we ask God to be in control of anything and everything in our lives. I might be wrong and I might just be rambling about nothing, but this is what I believe in.

Summer's End

Summer is coming to an end. Surprisingly, this summer's been pretty eventful. I wasn't really looking forward to summer school, but I got it done. 6 weeks of waking up at 6:40 and not coming home till 1 ish monday through thursday. I met a lot of people, and I had a pretty fun time. I'm not saying that I'd want to go again, but it wasn't really a waste of time. I worked out for most of the summer and ate healthy for some time. I met some new people here and there, and I had fun. Sure there was a downside, but that's just life. I wish I went on mission trip, but oh well. There's going to be plenty of more opportunites. Hopefully as summer ends and the new school year begins, I'll be able to stay on task and get my priorities straight. I really hope I can pull through with wrestling and badminton. If I can't...then oh well. at least I'll know that I tried. High school - don't leave with regrets.

I wish

I wish that I had some food in my house. :( i'm really hungry. I wish I had a band, and better guitar equipment. There's not much to entertain me right now. I've been through a lot of different phases, but I'm kinda disappointed in myself that I don't really take guitar that seriously anymore. When I first started playing back in 7th grade, I just picked it up because it was something to take up my time. Now after about 3 years and 9 months, Sure I've learned a bunch of new things, and I've played music that I never thought I would, but it just doesn't appeal to me that much anymore.

Poetry

I used to really be into poetry back in Freshman through Sophomore year. I would write anything that would help me get through some tough situations. It used to be my way to vent and just get a lot of things off my mind. I haven't really been thinking about how the past two years went, but it's whatever. What's done is done.

Sometimes a man wears stretchy pants in his room.. its for fun

Sometimes, things tend to get a little to hectic for me, and I forget that God is the One in control of anything and everything. I forget that God can pull anyone out of any situation as long as that person is willing to ask God for the help. It's amazing how we can forget how much God is working in our lives and live as though He didn't exist. At least...that's how it feels for me sometimes. I forget about God's mercy, his compassion, his NEVER-ENDING love for us, and at many instances I forget about God's patience. Before winter retreat comes, or during winter retreat, I want to feel God's joy and patience. I've felt his mercy and love. It was amazing. I don't need to tell the world of my faults and my imperfections. I shall end this post by saying, Make sure your actions reflect who you are....and know your place in this world.

FOR SPARTA!

today i got a battlescar. it was pretty crazy, but now it's sucks :[ hhaha man it's so stupid how i got it too. I climbed over my backyard fence today when I was walking to Kevin's and my hand got cut off of the fence. Oh I saw american cross country run from american all the way down to my house. lol hella far. I think it's like 4 or 6 miles going from american to my house and back....but anyways they're beasts :] I went to maze, waited in line forever, got my picture taken....and it was really akward. then i got my schedule. it doesn't look too fun this year :[ I really hope I can get Hashimoto for Alg 2. other than that, everything was peachy......but today at open mat, I was with this one fat white kid. He's gonna be an 8th grader I think.......but I've never met anyone smell that bad before. I swear I smelled him even when I got home. it was pretty bad. 2 weeks before school starts. gotta make the best of it!

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh and I guess we made it, or at least we made it this far..

SO...............here we are, about to start Junior year and ready for a fresh start! Today is maze for seniors and juniors. It's gonna be fun to see old friends and maybe make new ones. I feel a lot wiser and more aware of my surroundings now. Theres open mat today too. man I'm gonna be sore tomorrow. hahaha. One thing that really got me thinking was how I always say what I want, but I never actually pull through with it. It's been a really big problem for me within the past few years, but this year, I'm planning on changing that. I'm going to try my best to stick with all the things that I've said I'm going to stick with. I need to read more books too. OH! very exciting news. I'm losing weight. :D I don't know how much I weigh, but it's showing from mah belly. :] hahaha it's gonna be a lot of hard work, but nothing worth gaining comes easy. well.........I'm gonna go play starcraft for a bit, and then............probably go to american around like 11 ish, and then go to maze, open mat, and then come home. most likely to exchange my coins for cash at coinstar and then go to Kevin's and play some more starcraft :D It's been a good summer. got 2 weeks to enjoy the rest of it :]

syr

send your reign was very good. i liked the speaker. p.s im sweaty

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

got my shotty :D it's hella strong. hahaha i just need a pistol and a hi-cap mag now. sigh...so much moneys. OH and i got my uke :D but i gotta get it checked out. there's something wrong with it D:

grrrr

I hate tutor. I hate how summer is so boring. I hate having no food at home. I need to find something to get me off my feet. I've been going to Kevin's for the past like 5 days in a row. tee hee. We swam for the past 3. Oh So fun :]

Why Hello

I miss you.

Anyways, I just stayed up, waiting to see a meteor shower........but I didn't see much. just a lot of stars.....the lamp-post right next to my house.....and something twinkling. I had to carry my dog with me outside, so he wouldn't bark. Maybe I'll go outside in a bit. anyways my summer JUST started. Summer school's out. Still got tutor, but whatever. one year. I have Mr. and Mrs. Smith in the computer, but too lazy to watch it. I might watch it, and then go to sleep, or sleep and then watch it later. Open mat tomorrow? depends on what time i wake up. OH and today I bought new shoes :] pretty happy. YEAH!

http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y299/jonathankimchi/IMG_0796.jpg
http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y299/jonathankimchi/IMG_0798.jpg
http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y299/jonathankimchi/IMG_0799.jpg


I've been swimming a lot too.

HERRO

So I went to open mat for wrestling yesterday. Man.......I was so sore afterwards. Sigh...I guess that just means I have to get in shape. hahaha.

Plan for the weeks before summer ends -
Run/Jog everyday to Kevin's y practice stance/takedowns.
Try to eat healthy.
Maybe work out i.e. pushups, situps, pullups, jumprope, jog some more.
get clothes
maybe cut hair
catch up with mi amigos
pray a lot more
qt errrrrday
relax and enjoy summer.

I've been sleeping during the day after I got back from summer school, and also at night. I'm guessing that during one day, I'd sleep 10-11 hours total. very good. I hope that everyone updates their blogs soon. it's boring reading the same ones over and over. Not that I do.....it's just some people might want to read about their personal lives. :P hahaha jk.

so today

So today i had a very very very interesting dream. For the most part, I just remember Me, Kevin, and Allen shin. I think it was some church thing or we were on mission trip somewhere, and apparently i was in Cambodia with them. We went to this Korean restaurant in Cambodia and I ordered Jja-Jjang myun. The lady said to go sit and they'd bring it over to me....so I went to go sit at the table with Kevin and church ppls. Then I wait for like an hour.....and it never comes so I go and ask what happened to my food, and she said oh it already went out. and then I see Allen eating my jja-jjang myun so I get furious and I start yelling at him at the top of my lungs. And then Kevin says.....you should blog about this atrocity. Then I woke up laughing. hahah :]

Tuesday.

Nostalgia is a great feeling. When you walk past an old street, when you talk to old friends, when you listen to a certain song....it just feels so right......but then you start to feel a certain emotion of guilt, or sorrow. You begin to wonder why things turned out the way they did. or maybe you just smile and say "wow, was I stupid or what?" Either way, Nostalgia brings back memories. It's never really good to go back to the past, but sometimes I can't help it. I hate it.

Who?

Who is it that welcomes us with open arms? Who is it that pushes us to do the seemingly impossible, even if our faith is that of a mustard seed? Who is it that under every condition or through whatever action we take is always with us? Who is it that longs to see us and hear from us every single day of our lives? The answer? I'm sure whoever is reading this already knows. I just felt like sharing this amazing video with a very powerful meaning.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pP0bVvLT35w

Anyways, I had a really rough morning today. Things were just not what I expected. Same with Friday. A lot of little mishaps turned into one very unpleasant night. Today after church, I went over Tony's house to work out. Surprisingly enough, as I was on his computer, I watched that video, and it made me realize that NOTHING matters when God is in control. It doesn't matter if someone doesn't listen to you no matter how many times you tell them what you want, or if it seems like you're too far gone to come back to God, or even if you think that you're wasting your time somewhere. The thing is, God really does work in mysterious ways. He made me forget about all of my problems, even if it was after church, and just told me to calm down and get my priorities straight.

good morning!

I love it when I get a very good night's sleep, that I wake up not realizing what day it is. hahaha I think this is the most sleep I've gotten the entire summer. 11 hours. yay. I've been thinking about cutting my hair, but for now, I've decided to keep it.

I already know that I overthink things and I overanalyze way too much, but lately, it's been getting worse. I'm positive that the Devil's just pulling me off course of what God wants me to do. He's putting all of these blocks in front of me so that I can turn away from God, but I need to submerse myself within God's love, his Word, and just trust in him. For those that read this, please pray for me that God will be able to guide me and teach me as well as rebuke me so that I can be ready for his Will. No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. 1 Corinthians 10:13




Other than that, my life's been pretty peachy. Summer school is almost over! two more weeks. My normal routine for the day has gone from waking up, summer school, getting home, to tony's house, then working out, then tennis. But yesterday we went fishing and no one got a bite. It's okay. Theres always next time. :D Now I have to do SAT tutor homework and study. but first breakfast! so hopefully today will be a good day.

Summer

Summer is very monotonous, but it is also somewhat eventful. We went fishing today, but did not catch a thing. It's okay. We took a lot of pictures. The gang was Bae, Tony, Justin, Jeeae, Kevin, and myself. Hopefully next time we go, we'll get a bite. I'm waiting for summer school to end. I would like to have a job, so if anyone knows of any positions that are open and hiring, let me know :] . 2 more weeks of summer school! Can't wait. I like wearing 97 cent sweatbands.

Unashamed

I should be unashamed to lift up your name and your greatness in my life. I should be unashamed to call upon your name for mercy and grace. I should be unashamed to come before you with everything and lay it all down. I should be unashamed to stand here in my brokenness complete. These are many of the things that I should be unashamed of, but I am ashamed. For one reason, I'm here in this place. I let it happen. So just pray that God will bring me back.

Hello!

Today, Tony Joo got a Tennis Racket for $8 and I got a sweatband for 97 cents. Today is a great day.

Haven't updated in a while......

But here it goes. for the past three weeks, it's been full of Working out, fishing, tennis, eating healthy, as well as of course church. I'm too lazy right now, so I'll fill it in later.

Blog

Sometimes I wish that things didn't have to be so complicated. Sometimes I wish that it was easy. It's never going to be, so might as well work harder than ever. Work hard. Play hard.

money

I wish I had money. I wish I could buy the things I want. I wish money never existed. I know none of that made sense. lol :D

the eff?

I have a red X scar on my back. I have no clue how it got there. :[

Stress sucks.

http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y299/jonathankimchi/IMG_0516.jpg

YAY EMO SCREAMO

man I miss 8th grade. A lot of good memories back then. Now it's just stress, stress, and more stress. Stupid high school. 2 years. 2 MORE YEARS! then all will be done and a new part of my life will begin. Just keep focused on the things that need to get done. Work hard, Play hard. For the past 2 weeks, it's been filled with working out, fishing, eating tacos, and lately swimming :D.....but I wanna go catch that damn shark. Hopefully we'll go soon. the heat is unbearable.



Note to self- Go shop for shorts/jeans
outlet shopping for the best bang for your buck
Haircut
work out
study T_T
Stay out of the sun.


Now onto my dream - It was very weird. I was at some huge building with random people. I only remember Kevin,Tony, and Justin for some reason. We have to get out of the building, and we're in this arcade room. I find two bats and give one to Justin. Then we somehow get out and leave in a car. Then I wake up like 0_0. fun

To Whom It May Concern,

If you understood the complexity of how the human mind worked, would you still be here wondering how and why it happened? If you had a hint of the struggle and ache that this person had to go through, would you still be expecting that special moment or person to be there to pick you up where you had fallen? Try and take a look back and examine everything that's occurred within the past few months. Were they just fate? Or maybe it was the consequence of your actions and your selfish ambitions. Regardless of these words and whatever effect they've had on you, Just move forward. These things in the past are only holding you back from what you've been truly seeking. Don't go back.

pen15

hAx0rZ.

BUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA??!!??!??!!


SB is the best!!

I should remember to log out of stuff when I use other people's computers!

LASTS FOR UP TO 8 HOURS!!!


kthxbye~!

DUDE

DUDE WHAT THE EFF? i just found a salamander in my house........like right outside my brother's door. i caught it in a water bottle......but WHAT THE EFF DUDE?~! HOW THE HELL DID IT GET IN HERE?! pictures later.

EDIT - I forgot to tell about my fourth of July. Happy belated America! hahaha. anyways So the day started off with my 10 am Jog to Kevin Lee's jeep. Then I greeted him with a special "sweaty" hello. Then I ate some of his food and chilled. Then we went over to Sarah Brown's for an EM picnic. buhaha. Picnic crashers. Then there was an unpleasant occurrence, but whatever. Then we went swimming and chilled. We bought fireworks with Foxey bae bae and then we went back to Sb's. We made some legal fireworks uhmmmm special with Foxey bae bae's street knowledge. the Jooster had a very nice time with the sparklers a.k.a. kiddie works from K dawg. We lit fireworks and had a smashing time. Then we went back to K dawg's and chilled. Came home, slept, woke up at 9:30 cause I thought I had tutor at 10 but HE DIDNT COME UNTIL LIKE 12. I was upset but not too much. Now I'm thinking of what I'm going to do. probably go to the Jooster's and chill there. Have a good day Bloggy.


Later -
http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y299/jonathankimchi/1-25.jpg
http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y299/jonathankimchi/2-18.jpg

So......

It seems like blogspot is catching on. I remember back in 7th grade, my science teacher made us use this. He was ahead of his time. His name was Mr. Mann. hahahah what a funny guy. He used to hang his wet/used speedos on top of the classroom heater. it was gross. A couple years before I got to Thornton, I heard it dropped on some kid's head. sucks to be him. lol. Man this week went by really fast. Actually.....this summer's been pretty fast. Seems like yesterday that we got out of school. the past routine of everyday from monday-wednesday has been go to summer school :[, come home, go to Joo's house, work out like a beast, and then on tuesday we went fishing for 15 min, then on wednesday we went and ALMOST CAUGHT A LEOPARD SHARK, and then after all that excitement we go eat tacos. Today was a rest day for all of us. Somewhere in between all that, we washed Bae's car and ate steak. Very fun :] I think this summer is going to be a smash. BUT on an important note......God's been speaking to me in very different, but important ways this week. One was that he helped me focus my mind on praise team, and what I need to get accomplished as a praise leader, but I forgot what it was. I hate this. I think of something really important, but I forget it. Another thing was just to trust in him. I've been doing QT this whole week and it's helped out a lot. I'm hoping to make it a habit. I'm looking forward to Winter Retreat. A lot actually. Just because I need a Spiritual push. I mean I should be striving for that every day, but I'm going to try my best to keep it on a consistent level. Let's hope for the best!

OMGOMGOMGOMG

TODAY WE ALMOST CAUGHT A LEOPARD SHARK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Summmmmmer vacation baby

I shall miss you class of '08. :D have a good one.

So stressful and theres only 4 more days of school left.

So stop me if this sounds familiar. So you're living your life, you're doing whatever. Your life seems to be fine. Everything's well. But then something happens, and all of a sudden everything seems to spiral down. Familiar yet? Okay. Then you get this feeling inside you that maybe God's trying to tell you something. Maybe he's trying to save you from a road not necessary to take. Whatever the reason is.....You need to answer that calling. You cannot put it off until tomorrow. Right here and now. The only way God can bring you back is if you're willing. Keep that in mind.

Yay first blog

So I find it funny how when you reflect on your past high school year as the school year comes to an end...you realize all the mistakes you've made and all of the things you'll remember. you see the good and the bad. You live and you learn :]